Midlife Crisis

Have you ever been at that point in your life where you are at the crossroads? There are so many roads open to you,... and yet you know that the very act of choosing a path means that there are a million other paths that you cannot travel.

I feel like that right now.

Everyday I feel like I have to choose.

A few days after Bec and I broke up, I was feeling so bad, and yet I felt like I had done the right thing. I thought that I would be able to move on and we could still be friends.

Then she had a change of heart.

A few nights ago, she came around. We had another talk about what we wanted. She said that she had been thinking that she had made a wrong decision. That she had decided that it would be better to keep trying to make our relationship work.

It's not the relationship that's the problem though. As far as I'm concerned our relationship works great. I have never been more comfortable around any girl before. I have never felt such a connection with anybody. I don't know if I ever will.

So here we are now, and we are 'together' again. And I see her on Monday nights and she tells me about her week, and she asks me what I have been up to.

"Not much".

And I don't see her any other time. And days pass and decisions are not made.

And slowly... slowly..., everything becomes less.